Wilderness Poems 1966-1971 I think I was once I think we were Your milk is my wine My silk is your shine ~Mosaic~ a series of notes, prose-poems stories, bits of play & dialog Aphorisms, epigrams, essays Poems? Sure ~~~ ~The Opening of the Trunk~ -Moment of inner freedom when the mind is opened & the infinite universe revealed & the soul is left to wander dazed & confus'd searching here & there for teachers & friends. ~~~ Moment of Freedom as the prisoner blinks in the sun like a mole from his hole a child's 1st trip away from home That moment of Freedom ~~~ LAmerica Cold treatment of our empress LAmerica The Transient Universe LAmerica Instant communion and communication lamerica emeralds in glass lamerica searchlights at twi-light lamerica stoned streets in the pale dawn lamerica robed in exile lamerica swift beat of a proud heart lamerica eyes like twenty lamerica swift dream lamerica frozen heart lamerica soldiers doom lamerica clouds & struggles lamerica Nighthawk doomed from the start lamerica "That's how I met her, lamerica lonely & frozen lamerica & sullen, yes lamerica right from the start" Then stop. Go. The wilderness between. Go round the march. ~~~ he enters stage: Blood boots. Killer storm. Fool's gold. God in a heaven. Where is she? Have you seen her? Has anyone seen this girl? snap shot (projected) She's my sister. Ladies & gentlemen: please attend carefully to these words & events It's your last chance, our last hope. In this womb or tomb, we're free of the swarming streets. The black fever which rages is safely out those doors My friends & I come from Far Arden w/ dances, & new music Everywhere followers accrue to our procession. Tales of Kings, gods, warriors and lovers dangled like jewels for your careless pleasure I'm Me! ~~~ Can you dig it. My meat is real. My hands- how they move balanced like lithe demons My hair- so twined & writhing The skin of my face- pinch the cheeks My flaming sword tongue spraying verbal fire-flys I'm real. I'm human But I'm not an ordinary man No No No ~~~ What are you doing here? What do you want? Is it music? We can play music. But you want more. You want something & someone new. Am I right? Of course I am. I know what you want. You want ecstasy Desire & dreams. Things not exactly what they seem. I lead you this way, he pulls that way. I'm not singing to an imaginary girl. I'm talking to you, my self. Let's recreate the world. The palace of conception is burning. Look. See it burn. Bask in the warm hot coals. You're too young to be old. You don't need to be told You want to see things as they are. You know exactly what I do Everything ~~~ I am a guide to the Labyrinth Monarch of the protean towers on this cool stone patio above the iron mist sunk in its own waste breathing its own breath ~~~ ~Power~ I can make the earth stop in its tracks. I made the blue cars go away. I can make myself invisible or small. I can become gigantic & reach the farthest things. I can change the course of nature. I can place myself anywhere in space or time. I can summon the dead. I can perceive events on other worlds, in my deepest inner mind, & in the minds of others. I can I am ~~~ People need Connectors Writers, heroes, stars, leaders To give life form. A child's sand boat facing the sun. Plastic soldiers in the miniature dirt war. Forts. Garage Rocket Ships Ceremonies, theatre, dances To reassert Tribal needs & memories a call to worship, uniting above all, a reversion, a longing for family & the safety magic of childhood. ~~~ The grand highway is crowded w/ lovers & searchers & leavers so eager to please & forget Wilderness ~~~ Now is blessed The rest remembered ~~~ A man rakes leaves into a heap in his yard, a pile, & leans on his rake & burns them utterly. The fragrance fills the forest children pause & heed the smell, which will become nostalgia in several years ~~~ Sirens Water Rain & Thunder Jet from the base Hot searing insect cry The frogs & crickets Doors open & close The smash of glass The Soft Parade An accident Rustle of silk, nylon Watering the dry grass Fire Bells Rattlesnake, whistles, castanets Lawn mower Good Humor man Skates & wagons Bikes ~~~ Where'd you learn about Satan- out of a book Love?- out of a box ~~~ night of sin (The Fall) -1st sex, a feeling of having done this same act in time before O No, not again ~~~ Between childhood, boyhood, adolescence & manhood (maturity) there should be sharp lines drawn w/ Tests, deaths, feats, rites stories, songs, & judgements ~~~ Men who go out on ships To escape sin & the mire of cities watch the placenta of evening stars from the deck, on their backs & cross the equator & perform rituals to exhume the dead dangerous initiations To mark passage to new levels To feel on the verge of an exorcism a rite of passage To wait, or seek manhood enlightenment in a gun To kill childhood, innocence in an instant ~~~ ~Lamerica~ Trade-routes guide lines The Vikings & explorers Discoverers The unconscious a map of the states The veins of hiways Beauty of a map Hidden connections Fast trampled forest Madness in a whisper neon crackle The hiss of tires A city growls rich vast & sullen like a slow monster come to fat & die ~~~ ~The Anatomy of Rock~ The 1st electric wildness came over the people on sweet Friday. Sweat was in the air. The channel beamed, token of power. Incense brewed darkly. Who could tell then that here it would end? One school bus crashed w/a train. This was the Crossroads. Mercury strained. I couldn't get out of my seat. The road was littered w/dead jitterbugs. Help, we'll be late for class. The secret flurry of rumor marched over the yard & pinned us unwittingly Mt. fever. A girl stripped naked on the base of the flagpole. In the restrooms all was cool & silent w/the salt-green of latrines. Blankets were needed. Ropes fluttered. Smiles flattered & haunted. Lockers were pried open & secrets discovered. Ah sweet music. Wild sounds in the night Angel siren voices. The baying of great hounds. Cars screaming thru gears & shrieks on the wild road Where the tires skid & slide into dangerous curves. Favorite corners. Cheerleaders raped in summer buildings. Holding hands & bopping toward Sunday. Those lean sweet desperate hours. Time searched the hallways for a mind. Hands kept time. The climate altered like a visible dance. Night-time women. Wondrous sacraments of doubt Sprang sullen in bursts of fear & guilt in the womb's pit hole below The belt of the beast ~~~ Worship w/words, w/ sounds, hands, all joyful playful & obscene-in the insane infant. Old men worship w/long noses, old soulful eyes. Young girls worship, exotic, indian, w/robes who make us feel foolish for acting w/our eyes. Lost in the vanity of the senses which got us where we are. Children worship but seldom act at it. Who needs temples & couches & T.V. ~~~ We can do it on a sunny floor w/friends & make any sound or movement that comes. Roll on our backs screaming w/mirth glad in the guilt of our madness. Better to be cool in our worship & gain the respect of the ancient & wise wearing those robes. They know the secret of mind-change reality. ~~~ "Have you ever seen God?" -a mandala. A symmetrical angel. Felt? yes. Fucking. The Sun. Heard? Music. Voices Touched? an animal. your hand. Tasted? Rare meat, corn, water & wine. ~~~ An angel runs Thru the sudden light Thru the room A ghost precedes us A shadow follows us And each time we stop We fall ~~~ No one thought up being; he who thinks he has Step forward ~~~ Thrill demented sparrows bark The sun into being. They rule dawn's Kingdom. The cars- a rising chorus- Then workmen's songs & hammers The children of the schoolyard, a hundred high voices, complete the orchestration ~~~ "In that year there was an intense visitation of energy. I left school & went down to the beach to live. I slept on a roof. At night the moon became a woman's face. I met the spirit of Music." ~~~ An appearance of the devil on a Venice canal. Running, I saw a Satan or Satyr, moving beside me, a fleshy shadow of my secret mind. Running, Knowing. ~~~ The day I left the beach A hairy Satyr running behind & a little to the right. In the holy solipsism of the young Now I can't walk thru a city street w/out eying each single pedestrian. I feel their vibes thru my skin, the hair on my neck -it rises. ~~~ ~The Fear~ Eternal consciousness in the Void (makes trial & jail seem almost friendly) a Kiss in the Storm (Madman at the wheel gun at the neck space populous & arching coolly) A barn a cabin attic Your own face stationary in the mirrored window fear of restroom's Tragic cold neon I'm freezing animals dead white wings of rabbits grey velvet deer The Canyon The car a craft in wretched SPACE Sudden movements & your past to warm you in Spiritless Night The Lonely HWY Cold hiker Afraid of Wolves & his own Shadow ~~~ The Wolf, who lives under the rock has invited me to drink of his cool Water. Not to splash or bathe But leave the sun & know the dead desert night & the cold men who play there. ~~~ a ha Come on, now luring the Traveller Mighty Voyager Curious, into its dark womb The graves grinning Indians of night The eyes of night Westward luring into the brothel, into the blood bath into the Dream The dark Dream of conquest & Voyage into night, Westward into Night ~~~ Clothed in sunlight restless in wanting dying of fever Changed shapes of an empire Starling invaders Vast promissory notes of joy Wanton, willful & passive Married to doubt Clothed in great warring monuments of glory How it has changed you How slowly estranged you Solely arranged you Beg you for mercy ~~~ The Crossroads a place where ghosts reside to whisper into the ear of travellers & interest them in their fate Hitchhiker drinks: "I call again on the dark hidden gods of the blood" -Why do you call us? You know our price. It never changes. Death of you will give you life & free you from a vile fate. But is is getting late. -If I could see you again & talk w/you, & walk a short while in your company, & drink the heady brew of your conversations, I thought -to rescue a soul already ruined. To achieve respite. To plunder green gold on a pirate raid & bring to camp the glory of old. -As the capesman faces poisoned horns & drinks red victory; the soldier, too, w/his trophy, a pierced helmet; & the ledge-walker shuddering his way into inward grace -(laughter) Well then. Would you mock yourself? -No -Soon our voices must become one, or one must leave. ~~~ Forest strong sandals burnt geometry fingers around a fire reading history in blackened books, charcoal sentence in moot splendor Flame-tree Sire, we met in Eden The troubled time we had rustling in the night leaves a sniper aimed at our window a kitten mewing in the blasted strong air I must go see -You've found your Voice, friend, after all else I recognize fast the Strong sure tones of a poet was it a question search or of strangling? I wonder We never talked But welcome here to the camp fire Share our meal w/us & tell us of your life & the hanging -Well 1st I screamed & I was a child again alive Then nothing til the age of 5 & then summers & the racetrack I looked for a girl in New Mexican bars & found jail The prostitute looked out her cell & saw Fuck god scratched on a leprous wall -You're rambling boy what of the rest the jazz hi