As I Look Back


As I look back
over my life
I am struck by post
cards
Ruined Snap shots

faded posters
Of a time, I can't recall
~~~

I am a Scot, or so
I'm told. Really
the heir of Mystery
Christians

Snake in the Glen

The child of a
Military family...

I rebelled against church
after phases of
fervor

I curried favor in school
& attack'd the teachers

I was given a
desk in the corner

I was a fool
&
The smartest kid
in class
~~~

Walks in D.C. in
Negro streets. The library
& book stores. Orange
brick in warm sun.
The books & poets magic

Then sex gives greater stimulation
Than you've ever known &
all peace & books lose their
charm & you are thrown
back on the eye of vision
~~~

History of Rock
coinciding w/my
adolescence

Came to LA to
Film School

Venice Summer

Drug Visions

Roof top songs

early struggles &
humiliations

Thanks to the girls
who fed me.
~~~

Making Records

Elvis had sex-wise
mature voice at 19.

Mine still retains the
nasal whine of a
repressed adolescent
minor squeaks & furies
An interesting singer
at best-a scream
or a sick croon. Nothing
in-between.
~~~

~Road Days~

fear of Plane death

And night was what Night
should be
A girl, a bottle, & blessed sleep

I have ploughed
My seed thru the heart
of the nation.
Injected a germ in the psychic blood vein.

Now I embrace the poetry
of business & become-for
a time-a "Prince of Industry"
~~~

A natural leader, a poet,
a Shaman, w/the
soul of a clown.

What am I doing
in the Bull Ring
Arena
Every public figure
running for Leader

Spectators at the Tomb
-riot watchers

Fear of Eyes
Assassination

Being drunk is a good disguise.

I drink so I
can talk to assholes.
This includes me.
~~~

The horror of business

The Problem of Money
guilt
do I deserve it?

The Meeting
Rid of Managers & agents

After 4 yrs. I'm left w/a
mind like a fuzzy hammer

regret for wasted nights
& wasted years
I pissed it all away
American Music
~~~

End w/fond good-bye
& plans for future
-Not an actor
Writer-filmmaker

Which of my cellves
will be remember'd

Good-bye America
I loved you

Money form home
good luck
stay out of trouble